Wendy Rules of Rest Version 3

Language.


The persistence,
The sheer persistence- working it all out, , framing it all up ,
underpinning your hard earned pause with a new heard quiet.

Flirty language – coming up with stuff like Yours and Mine and I and You and all that pluralized WE cohering all over us.
Bring on more of those slicing words with their High Definition , Look at That Why Don’t You fancy footwork tautology.
and All those would if I could explanations- umming and erring through the day,
headbutting the muddle til it hurts.

Some non slip anaylsis here, some cheer up opinion there and a quick flash of build me up banter to move it all along.
And some of that
We Just Went Down the caff and cooked ourselves up a whole new set of chances with words like Courage and Gather and Trust and Mexican Radio dropped in and out like a dictionary on heat.

Break up the Quiet. Inject the silence.
Those doubt ridden words start wobbling in with their cared for curiosity and pared down passion making the most of all those half heard thoughts and half baked songs that have been queing up for airtime, waiting their turn for the chance to alter the air.

Those slowly fermenting syllables finally coming out with their”This is the Nearest I can get for now, is it helping or should I really shut up? it does seem hard to know whether being here at all is of any use but I’m going to say it anyway because somehow it seems important just to make an offer of who I am and what seems important and maybe just to hear how this sounds will be part of how to start finding out”
It used to be just
( count 15)
Staring, Vagueness, Displacement and Growling,
But first it’s a little bit of “ Yeah that’s possible …” here and a little bit of “ I don’t know, maybe perhaps …… ” there and before you know it its:

I had to join the dots to make it work.
Or
I can only consider.
Or
I so not wanted to be there in the middle of the space.
and why? Why?
you were and I don’t know, maybe I don’t know I can’t remember and I can guess. And you chose and again its retrospective and I think that I didn’t think beyond that and its interesting . I surprised myself and I liked and I liked and I’m not phased .
Do it to death till you die and what you said
, “ single minded and clear choices “,

and I was drawn to it and if I’ve learnt nothing else I think I know I am –and as I/m thinking I/m constructing and I/m kind of pushing - I/m pushing it .

And we don’t know , we can only guess and suggest and we only know from texts and words
and I feel so lost .
I couldn’t find the space and I guess I was asking for me, and I thought I was thinking “ why and I/m not ? “
and I am trying to have something so far away from me ,
and I ,and I am curious to know more what is happening when we do this and
I’m struggling and--- I don’t know, I don’t know and this is who I am .
And I enjoy and I just want to be and I gather and I like that and that’s how I’ve been taught and I think my main question is :
And
If you know what your identity is - I could tell you and.
I think my main question is this …
I came and looked and I said I’m going to start getting ready and when can I start doing what I want to again and where I can be free ?
And also
I came, I saw and logged and I tried not to be and maybe my better question is :
Could you and what is the nature?
I am so accepting and are you looking for a name I wonder. My question is :

Everywhere people do this and there you go.
And I came in ,with an expectation, and I was ready to throttle.
I put myself in and I think there’s a……… I think there’s very practical reasons and you always have to produce something and I find this extraordinary . I would like more of this and can I ask you why.
And I loved and enjoyed and I finally woke up and wanted to try and make myself .
or
I would see people and when I looked around and you weren’t blank and I was really fighting an urge and I want to ask is there anything practical or I am still exploring ?
I stood up and I felt perfectly fine there., I felt like myself and I am feeling
And I think I heard something and because its so everywhere .
I thought it was all about and then I found it was and I realised what should I do.

And I don’t know the attempts and the needs and something like this:
lets say I believe and I just have a belief and if I watch and check out my very own , my very own and things like that and do find myself in- will find myself in trusting and maybe I can get across and I am just trying to get through and I’m, I’m a bit……………..
and all of that I think and I wonder and I think and I think and I think and think and how can you tell?
and I thought and I thought and I thought I miss that.
You have to be you
and sometimes I found it and didn’t disturb it.
And. I was writing and I thought , once you start- just kept on going and I thought I can’t go and I held on and paused everybody .


and you know I kind of feel what’s the worse that can happen?
Would I be dead ? Would I be injured?
and I enjoyed just following that and then at some point I turned round and saw you and I started crying a bit and I just decided I would just take a moment and I think I realised I kind of was holding and I hadn’t seen that and ermm ermm ……………..
and I don’t know what to say really.
and I nearly had you and I just wanted to try it and wanted to and also didn’t and I had a moment and you stopped me in my track and for me,
you don’t start dancing with me if you’re not going to finish it”

“I’m quite glad I’m not what I think”

and
my writing and your lighting and I’m listening to desires and can I and why don’t we? and I’m cured and

hallelujah and hallelujah

and we all are and we live in the world and I think we all are and I mean it , no I mean it more and we started to notice and you became and I gave myself and found out that I uttered a few words I didn’t speak today .